Two years ago I woke up in a fog of sadness and dispair and didn't even know it. Two years ago I put myself on autopilot and basically veared all over the road like a drunk driver. I stopped caring about what I looked like, what I wanted out of life, basically I stopped caring about anything at all. I pulled away from friends, I stopped caring about scrapbooking, I didn't do much of anything but just exist from day to day. I went numb. In a nutshell I went all dark and twisty like Meridith on grey's..only I didn't try and drown myself in the bathtub. It's funny that in the midst of all that happening I didn't really KNOW it was even happening. I just kind of started slipping away.
I'm not dwelling on the reasons behind the cloudy disposition,because there are a million reasons and dwelling doesn't fix or change any of them, but instead enjoying the new found sunshine in my life. It wasn't until December when I finally came out of the fog, that I realized just how incredibly sad and pathetic I had let myself become. Interestingly enough..I can see it happening now when I go back and read parts of my blog...or I should say the lack of posts on my blog. I just didn't have anything to say anymore. But I'm pretty sure that's all behind me now. I know this will sound rather alarming to some..like I need a padded room with a pretty white jacket with shiny buckles..lol..but I really am ok. In fact I'm better than ok these days..well, aside from the 50 lbs I put on during this 2 year wallowing time. lol But I'm working on that again too.
Lately I've felt blog posts brewing. Truthfully, it's one of the ways I knew for sure that I was coming back to life again. I feel the need to write and post and be spunky. I've missed the spunky. We have alot of ground to cover that is for sure. Stay tuned..I'm back. :)